Containeromancy

[tmcg]

Found inside the pressure cooker today when I went to clean it out for dinner:

A June Tabor CD (Against the Streams)
A white cardboard tab
A paperback copy of The Low-Carb Cookbook
A paper clip
A .60mm nylon guitar pick

Can the contents of inappropriate containers be read like tea leaves?

Comments

[gfjames.livejournal.com]

I don't know if contents of a pressure cooker can be read like tea leaves or not, but the ingredients described certainly say some things about what meals must be like at your house.

[terrymcgarry.livejournal.com]

And what probably became of my CD-ROM of Web 11. Yes.

[ferragus.livejournal.com]

In order to properly interpret your reading one must know:

1. What were you planning to cook? (did you end up cooking it?)
2. What time of day was it when you made this reading? (exact is ok, but even early afternoon, later morning is useful)
3. Where you burning any candles/incense that morning? if so what scent (Tobacco counts if there was nothing else burning!)
4. What compass direction where you facing when you made the reading? (I'm pretty sure your front door faces east, and the stove is on the north side of the house but to get the pot you might have been facing any which way so ...)
5. Any omens recently? (The traditional ones, a three headed raven flying south-southwest over your property, lightning striking the statue of (insert proper name here) from a clear sky, a plague of frogs or fishes are well and good, but there are the modern omens too, a fire truck going by, police activity, power/cable/internet outages, computer gremlins are all valid omens in these times and should be considered in a proper reading.

Please provide as much of the above as you can recall, I'll convene a coven of the oddest minds I can find and we should be able to give you a full interpretation in two or three decades, just keep the support checks coming.

;)

[larryhammer]

Does it have to be three-headed? Would two do?

---L.

[ferragus.livejournal.com]

Very good question!

I've consulted the ancient and appropriate tomes and it seems that the three headed beast was only needed until the turn of the last millennium. At present the actual number or even presence of a head is entirely optional.

One text (and alas there is only Feingeld's "Modern Day Signs, Omens and Portents in the 21st Century" to fall back on) points out that driverless automobiles and tractors can readily be used in place of the more traditional headless flying fowl. It's good to know that someone is keeping the old arts alive.

[terrymcgarry.livejournal.com]

ROTF!

We cooked potatoes. Which proves that we didn't consult the low-carb cookbook first. We did not eat all the potatoes upon mashing them. Some were consumed the next day. Exact portion measurements to be determined Real Soon Now.

It was midafternoon, as the meal being prepared was for Mother's Day and so intended for enjoyment on the early side, before said mother's TV programs came on.

No idea what mixture of effluents may have permeated the air at the time, or what compass direction I was facing when I opened the pressure cooker to reveal the Items of Bemusement. There were undoubtedly Omens. I will consult the other eyewitnesses and prepare an account.

I realize this may cloud the viewing.

It does, however, probably explain why I can't find akaspeedo's copy of Spin State.

Umm . . . .

[whyette-h.livejournal.com]

I really don't know about the contents, but I thought I'd just let you know that us peoples over at the Eiden Myr message boards are getting quite worried about you!!!!

Re: Umm . . . .

[terrymcgarry.livejournal.com]

Aieee! Thanks for the ping! I'll be back over there this evening.